That Person Who Never Did Show Up

Perhaps I was born in the wrong place or the wrong time. I was probably supposed to be born at a time when the closest neighbor was miles away so you didn't have to actually see them very often. The invention Most days all I want is to be alone...a great distance from everyone and every intrusion. I long for something that doesn't exist anymore in today's connected world. We're all intertwined in our self-made webs of communication with others while we leave no time to communicate with ourselves.

A desire to spend my life completely alone haunts me these days. I want to go away discover myself so badly that a wave of aching fills me with the intense pressure of my need. I long for solitude...for the quiet that comes with being truly alone with oneself. There are days when it takes superhuman strength to keep me here in my real life. I'm listening more and more to the voice inside my head that's telling me to Just Go And Be Alone. I get so into it that I think I could just get up and go wherever the world takes me. I want to just close the door on my old life and walk into the unknown and see what happens...see what I haven't had the opportunity to see before. See who I was supposed to be when I grew up, that person who never did show up.